Did you know that when sex is good, it adds 15-20% additional value to a relationship? But when sex is bad or non-existent, it drains about 50-70% of the positive value right out the window. A healthy and satisfying sex life is positive for both your health and your well being.
- Making it fun. The good thing about improving our intimate relationship is that it doesn’t have to be a grinding exercise in self-discipline. In fact, it shouldn’t be. You want to tickle the most primitive pleasure centers in your brain—the part that eons of evolution fine-tuned so that sex is pleasurable and intimacy is deeply satisfying. So, a light touch and playful intent is often better than acts of will and grim resolve.
- Making it specific. Grandiose is good but measurable is better. Make a pact to improve your pelvic health by using a vaginal moisturizer daily and a few reps of kegels four times a day. Notice at least one thing you like about your partner every day, and express appreciation for it. Suggest one new position to try each month, etc. You can also use vaginal dilators to reduce pain during intercourse and improve sexual intimacy by lengthening and stretching the vagina naturally. This can do wonders for your sex life.
- Being realistic. Even with something that’s supposed to be light-hearted, like improving your sex life, you should realistically assess what is likely to work for both you and your partner.
- Writing it down. Or better yet, get your partner’s suggestions and buy-in, so both of you are involved. Resolutions are more likely to be successful when you’ve made a verbal or written commitment.
- Persevere. Of course your resolve will wax and wane. Of course you’ll forget about your date night or run out of nice things to notice about your partner- but don’t give up, get up and start again!