Holiday joy is all around you, but you’ll miss it if you’re just going through the motions.
Jill Palmquist shares tips to help you get present and awaken to the wonder of the season.
With the winter holidays closing in, too many of us are checking all the obligatory boxes. Put up the tree or light the menorah? Check. Trudge off to the family dinner (and, like Clark Griswold’s dad, get through it with a little help from Jack Daniel’s?)? Check. Spend way too much money on presents? Check. Problem is, most of us power through these traditions on autopilot, only half-present, missing the magical moments of the season. We kind of know this (don’t we?), but we don’t know how to stop it.
Jill Palmquist, Life Time Inc.’s vice president and chief storyteller, says it’s time to change that. This time of year is brimming with joy and miracles and magic—and once we see that, it’s just a hop, skip, and jump to realizing that this is true of all of life.
“Once you start noticing awe-inducing moments, you see that they are everywhere,” says Palmquist, author of In This Lifetime (Wise Ink, September 2024, ISBN: 978-1-63489-689-4, $105.00). “This can be a life-altering revelation. Suddenly, instead of going through the motions, you are living in a new reality where it’s all miraculous—especially the fact that we get to be alive, witnessing it all in these incredible bodies, spending time with those we love.”
In This Lifetime is on the surface a coffee table book. But look deeper and it’s a distilled master class in waking up to the magic of simply being alive, with amazing bodies and curious minds that can do so many incredible things. The book is filled with breathtaking photographs, thought-provoking essays, proverbs, parables, conversation starters, and distilled snippets of life wisdom to help you be present for the holidays and beyond.
To get out of your head this holiday season; live in the moment; and make space for wonder, gratitude, and joy, try the following tips:
Keep it simple and embrace the imperfect. We are perfectly imperfect creatures so of course our holidays won’t go entirely as planned, explains Palmquist. The key is to keep your to-do list short, give yourself grace, and laugh at the inevitable mishaps that will pop up.
“Typically, what stresses us out is trying to do too much—too much food, too many gifts, too many obligatory events—and then being upset because we fell short,” she notes. “Or, we think things have to go off without a hitch…and when the kids fight, or the cookies burn, or the dog gets into the mashed potatoes, it can feel like the end of the world.
“Two mindset shifts can help here,” adds Palmquist. “One, realize it’s okay to keep your celebrations simple. Two, unclench and let go of the need for perfection. Learn to pause and notice the magic that’s happening before your eyes.”
Celebrate everything. It doesn’t matter that all the shopping isn’t done, or that bills loom, or that your gingerbread didn’t rise enough. As Palmquist writes in In This Lifetime: “Get out the good china. Light the candles. Blast holiday music. Something extraordinary has happened. We are here! Today! Together!”
Realize in one day there are one thousand opportunities to be kind. Find ways to be of service to others for one or two days of the season. Not only does this feel great, but it’s also a way to make a positive impact on your community and the world. Volunteer for your local hospice. Collect coats and care kits to pass out to unhoused people in your area. Buy a few gifts for a family struggling to put presents under the tree for their children.
Sidestep digital rabbit holes and firmly plant yourself in the real world. Don’t allow yourself to get distracted by spending hours doomscrolling on social media. It can make you feel you’re missing out, or that your holiday plans aren’t as exciting as someone else’s, or that the world is a dark and terrible place (when in reality, there are some bright spots).
“Life is heartbreakingly short,” says Palmquist. “Rather than wasting your (limited) time online, connect with a friend; listen to holiday music; or bundle up and go outside for a long walk in the crisp, cool air. The real world is far richer and fuller and more rewarding than the virtual one.”
Get out of your head and into your body. Feel your heartbeat. (It beats 100,000 times a day.) Breathe in every breath. Look at your strong, beautiful legs. Take in what the two million working parts of your eyes are showing you—the shimmering lights, the dance of the fireplace flames, the faces of your children. Let the smells of the holidays—pine boughs, sugar cookies, peppermint—transport you back to childhood. (Your nose remembers more than your eyes.)
Eat, drink, and be merry. Food is one of the great pleasures of life. Don’t mindlessly inhale those delectable holiday nibbles. To experience culinary joy, indulge your senses when you eat or drink. Slow down and taste every sip of your peppermint mocha. Close your eyes so you can enjoy every crumb of that homemade graham cracker pie crust. You’re less likely to go overboard when you take time to taste and enjoy your food and drinks.
Remember…movement and exercise save and preserve your body’s good condition. Lack of movement destroys it. In other words, don’t let cold winter temps or jam-packed holiday schedules tempt you to sink into sluggishness. Exercise helps us feel alive. You’ll feel better physically and help fight seasonal doldrums if you move your body throughout the holidays. Make a few fitness dates each week that you can look forward to and pencil them into your planner. (Or, try Life Time’s 20-day Holiday Hustle program if you’re feeling ambitious.)
Too many invites? Prioritize your tribe. If some people in your life bring the opposite of joy, don’t feel guilty about making a polite excuse. This might mean not attending your company Christmas party or declining to spend time with a family member you always clash with. Instead, make a plan to spend time with people who love you during the holidays.
Ask yourself: What if this is the last time? Palmquist writes: What if this was the last time you kissed that small, sweaty forehead goodnight? …Or said I love you? Or put your nose in his cheek and drank in the Old Spice? What if this was the last time you held that hard and callused hand in your hand? What if this was the last time she said your name, the way that it came from her mouth, making you feel alive. And special.
Perhaps you’ve noticed: Joy happens when we’re fully in the moment. That’s why Palmquist says your present (gift) is the present (now).
“We’ve got only this very moment,” she says. “Everything else is the ghost of holidays past or future…and the future is not guaranteed. Whatever you’re doing over the next several weeks, pause as often as you can to realize what’s happening in the moment. That mysterious clock that started the day you were born could stop at any time. The best gift you can give yourself is to seize the joy that presents itself, right now.”
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About the Author:
Jill Palmquist is Life Time vice president and chief storyteller and the author of In This Lifetime, a coffee table book that celebrates the beauty and reminds us of the brevity of the human experience. A graduate of the University of Minnesota School of Journalism, she worked as an agency copywriter. With the birth of her daughter, she took a leap to go freelance, working on a variety of fun brands for a variety of fun companies, including luxury leisure and lifestyle company Life Time. While never pretending to understand the founder’s brilliant brain, she did understand his heart and realized her desire to help people see the magnificence of their lives was completely aligned with his. Both her love of the company and responsibilities grew, proving what they say is true: time flies when you’re having fun. (That baby girl is now 23 years old.) While happy with all the work she’s done for the company, it’s true fulfillment she feels in contributing to the brand’s recent transformation.
About the Book:
In This Lifetime (Wise Ink, September 2024, ISBN: 978-1-63489-689-4, $105.00) is available from Life Time, Inc.
About Life Time:
Life Time (NYSE: LTH) empowers people to live healthy, happy lives through its portfolio of more than 170 athletic country clubs across the United States and Canada. The health and wellness pioneer also delivers a range of healthy-way-of-life programs and information via its complimentary Life Time Digital app. The company’s healthy living, healthy aging, healthy entertainment communities and ecosystem serve people 90 days to 90+ years old and is supported by a team of more than 45,000 dedicated professionals. In addition to delivering the best programs and experiences through its clubs, Life Time owns and produces nearly 30 of the most iconic athletic events in the country.
